Between Word and Meaning, Part I

Have you ever read a book that changed your life? 

Now, I’m not referring to your favorite book, but there is potential for your favorite book and a life-changing book to be one and the same. When I think of favorite, though, I think of entertaining; a rip-roaring read that kept me glued to the page (or earbuds for audiobooks) because the story was engaging and the writing was either unobtrusive and almost unnoticeable (a very hard thing for writers to do) or the writing itself was part of the story. 

A life-changing book, on the other hand, is one that speaks to you in a profound way or reveals to you a truth about life as-of-yet unknown to you; one whose message you find meaning in and it manages to penetrate to your marrow. 

That’s the kind of book I want to talk about. 

Before I get started I want to be candid: as much as I love to write, it’s actually a pretty hard thing for me to do. I’m a distractible guy and my mind races. If you’ve ever talked to me in person, you may notice that sometimes I take a long pause before I speak or maybe draw out a word’s ending a little too long or kind of stop in the middle of a sentence, but that’s because I’m trying to collect my thoughts.

Getting my thoughts from my brain to my mouth is one thing, but getting them written-out is another level of difficult for me. I’m thinking sentences and paragraphs ahead; I’ve pre-written things out in my mind and I want to get to the point as quickly as possible while also effectively establishing a sense of purpose, setting myself up as a knowledgeable guide, earning your trust in this narrative… And yet there has to be a certain level of hubris involved to even think that others would consider my words worth reading, right? 

This struggle isn’t always apparent in the final product. I mean… God, I hope not! It’s supposed to be polished and pristine and perfect; each word and phrase and paragraph meticulously crafted for you, Reader. So I just wanted to get it out there in the open that my writing tends to reflect my mind: prone to tangents; random asides and meanderings off the path I am supposed to take. Just like when I go out in nature though, I always find my way back to the trail. 

Before I get really started with the whole point of this thing, I do want to go off off off tangent just a little more: it’s weird and raw and a little thrilling to write about this topic (which I’ll get to, just be a little patient with me, please [carrot, meet the stick]) because it truly has affected me in a deep and meaningful way. Those close to me have heard me talk about this book and subject more than a few times as it is something that has opened my eyes… Really, like a veil being lifted… There’s a certain clarity, now. 

Without any further distractions: I’d like to talk to you about a comic book. 

(And just like that, I’m about to not talk about the book I am meaning to talk about. I’m distractible and prone to tangents, remember?)

There’s this irrational hatred I have for book reviews that just summarize the plot and then say, “Sure, it was good and you should read it.” A review shouldn’t be “the book starts like this and then this happens and then that happened and then the book ended.” What a snoozefest. Yes - it’s important to relay what happens in a book, but a book’s plot isn’t what a book is about. 

I know I’m splitting hairs and being pedantic, but it’s important to me that you understand my perspective on things and where I’m coming from. 

Why am I making this distinction? Because I’m going to be talking about a book and not a whole lot about its plot - even though a book’s plot is vital to understanding what it’s about. Yeah, I know I’m not making a whole lot of sense. See the previous paragraph. 

The whole point I’m trying to make: by the time this series is finished I want you to have a deep appreciation for what this book is about (to me!) rather than having a thorough grasp on what happens in the book. 

Again, these distinctions are important for me to establish because, as you’ll learn in future parts of this series, minute distinctions are important. How large is the gulf between word and meaning? What actions do we take to widen or narrow that gulf? Are these actions intentional? 

I want to get this out of the way because I feel like you’re getting the impression that I’m setting this up for some grand reveal but I really am not: this series is going to be discussing Alison’s Bechdel’s Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic. This graphic novel / memoir (“tragicomic”) is author/illustrator Bechdel’s examination of her life growing up in the funeral home owned and operated by her parents and the complicated relationship with her father whom she believes died by suicide. 

So what is the book really about? Our complicated relationship with the truth. Or maybe it should be stylized as: The Truth? For me, this is the axis upon which the entire book spins. This is what has me in a chokehold. This is why this book is life-changing.

But as you may have guessed, it’ll take me some time to get there. It’s not about the destination so much as the journey. This totally absolves me of any further tangents that may or may not lead anywhere or provide any additional information on any topic. Just FYI.

I promised myself each entry would be less than (but now roughly) 1,000 words because our attention spans have been cooked by social media and I am certain no one really wants to spend more than 10 minutes reading anything I have to say. 

So I leave you with this question to ponder before I push you into this literary pool so that we may swim together in search of… something…: what is your relationship with the truth (The Truth)?